Ugh.

Feel the need to update, especially since I haven't posted an entry in so long. I have so many posts in the cold-storage of drafts I just haven't gotten around to posting anything because I'm so busy :(

Mid-years are in 2 days, well one by the time I get this post up. Been a pretty reasonable week, that started off really great and just got progressively worse till Friday, that culminated into me being an tired emotional blob, which just made me that close to having a breakdown. Thankfully I didn't, because I ended the night off well, thank you Lloyd for making me laugh till my sides hurt at Coffee Bean and that little bit better about myself that night. I think the stress of being in the IB is just getting to me. Plus I'm getting all these feeling of inadequacy and insufficiency now just re-emphasizes how brilliant it is being me.

I want to be good enough some how, like enough at least for something and someone. I hate that I'm not enough for meeting the caliber for a certain grade and for certain people to be comfortable with. I hate that I'm reminded that that I'm not enough and what's more is that I hate that this bothers me so much when it honestly shouldn't.

Feeling so bothered by school and work and stress and emotions and being such a bad ball of annoying small-ness I'm pretty surprised the people around me haven't thrown something at me yet :|

As always, infinitely grateful to the people around me who deal with my shit. Thank you to Nat, Lloyd, Gwen, Ching Yi, Ethan, Amelia and Kai Sing for this week and everything that you guys have ever done for me.

Tsui